Thoughts from Allison Hope's 2022 essay, "Watching a Partner Change Is Hard. Accepting It Can Be Harder.":

We don't marry one person as much as we marry one version of a person, a snapshot of who we (and our partner) are individually and to one another at the moment when we say "I do." Who we are five, 10 or 40 years later is anybody's guess.

People change. As a result, relationships change, too.

... and from Amy Sutherland in 2006, "What Shamu Taught Me About a Happy Marriage", to help someone change for the better:

• reward good behavior and don't respond to bad
• make the right thing easier to do
• celebrate small steps
• never blame!
  

... and be a careGIVER, not a careTAKER!

(cf LOOPY - Caregiving vs Caretaking (2021-09-30), Navigating Ambiguous Loss (2021-12-28), ...) - ^z - 2022-04-28